why can't you be proud of me?

why can’t you be proud that I never requested you to buy me anything?
why can’t you be proud that I obediently entered form6 without questioning you why must I?
why can’t you be proud that I didn’t flung my stpm?
why can’t you be proud that I entered local university?
why can’t you be proud that I settled study loan all by myself?
why can’t you be proud that I bought the pc with my own study loan?
why can’t you be proud that I never requested any extra money except for that rm200 monthly that covers all my expenses (I never even requested for that rm200)?
why can’t you be proud that I worked part time during schooling to earn and buy what I wished to have?
why can’t you be proud that I graduated just as a physics degree holder?
why can’t you be proud that I found my first earning?
why can’t you be proud that I always bring the whole family for luxurious dining on special occasions?
why can’t you be proud that I traveled to different places every year on my own expenses?
why can’t you be proud that I insisted to pay monthly home allowance although my earning is just basically enough?
why can’t you be proud that I insisted to give out more than half of my bonus pay to help out the family financial?
why can’t you be proud that I sponsored a portion of my sister’s uni fee?
why can’t you be proud that I tried to work out a serious relationship with the man I love?
why can’t you be proud that I never thrifty in buying my sisters some basic necessity of their teenage life (clothes, bag, thumbdrives, watch, cd player etc)?
why can’t you be proud that I am always so independent and strong (at least I try to portray that I am)?

although I’m not the smartest, the prettiest, the most successful as you would wish I can be but why can’t you just be proud of whom I am now, who I am today. at least let me feel that you are proud of me for once. you may not mean what you had just blurted out but those words really crush my heart like how a hammer smashed on a mirror. smithereens.